Clients Say The Funniest Things

Clients Say the Funniest Things

We really like what you’ve done [for our marketing campaign], and we like working with you. That’s big praise, coming from us, because we usually we chew consultants up and spit them out. Almost always. But we’d be glad to work with you again.
— a client I didn’t actually work with, again :-)

See what you can do with actual data?
— a member of my client’s advisory board, speaking to the CEO.

So… we paid you $18,000 to tell us we should have more staff meetings?
— a client, who was kind of right.  They’d learned how to work as a team instead of a bunch of free agents.

Wow. This is great. You’ve helped me so much more than what you charge. So, yeah, you gave me a huge friend-discount. But even without it, I’d still think I got more than I paid for.
— a friend, thinking strategically about career changes and where they fit into her plan.

Our invoice is how much?! Oh my. A bargain. Such a bargain!
— one of my favorite clients, ever.

Holy ____. You just met us five minutes ago, and you already know everything we’ve gone through over the last two years?!
— new entrepreneurs are often surprised to learn that their business, while unique, often evolves along one of a few common paths.

It took 18 months, but all the stuff you told me finally sunk in. Last quarter, I booked more business than I had over the previous two years.
— by the time he told me, I had no idea what I’d told him.

Client:  I’ve made a big shift in the way I think about managing the company and the team. It’s much better now. Less stressful, for sure. And everyone else is taking on more.
Me: Cool. So, how did you get the idea for that? [suppresses smile]
Client: I can’t remember. [sincerely spoken]
Me: [looks away so client won’t see my eyes roll] — I guess this is a good thing :-)
— She liked my idea enough to take it in, weave it into her own ways, and grow the blend into something all her own. That’s a real compliment, even if it doesn’t get me a lot of referrals :-)

 I thought that marketing was bullshit. Now I know it doesn’t have to be.
— one of the smartest clients I’ve ever had, and smart enough to change his mind when he ought to.

Don’t worry about returning my phone call from yesterday.  After I left you a message, I thought, “what would Phil have said if I had been able to ask him my question?”  Soon enough, the answer came to mind, and that’s what I did.  Thanks!
— one of my more intuitive clients (with a science PhD)